But, I felt led to recently. I've spent so much time being busy lately. Busy with work, busy with church, busy with family, busy with friends. But busy isn't always good! In face, I despise busy. I hate that lately I feel like I have been so busy that I'm missing everything. I'm just quickly buzzing through life, watching the minutes, hours, and days pass me by, and not savoring any of it.
There's a quote that says, "Busy is a drug that a lot of people are addicted to." And I'm one of them. I'm severely addicted to busy. I want so badly to make a difference. To do something important. And so I pack my days and then at the end of the day, I sit in silence and think of how much I missed, how much I didn't do, and how much I wish I wouldn't have been so busy. I feel like when there is downtime, I'm not being productive and just wasting time. But there is so much beauty in the un-busy.
So I challenged myself over the last week to take time to not be busy. I savored the cuddles I got from my boys. I gazed at my family for a few extra minutes each time I saw them. I prayed more than usual. And I saw some moments that I don't always take the time to see. I also decided to photograph a few moments in each day that I thought were beautiful. Now, that doesn't mean I carried my camera around and photographed every single thing, because when you do that, you don't get to live in the moment. Sure, you have that photo forever, but what about the memory? You aren't living in that memory. You're only documenting it. So I just kept the camera in a handy place and if it was close, I grabbed it. I challenged myself to take at least two photos of the beauty I saw in my day each day for a week. Some of my favorite ones aren't the ones I expected them to be...
Cameron decided to try to touch his tongue with his nose for five straight minutes and giggled until he got to the point that he couldn't stick his tongue out anymore.
If you watch Ben throughout the day, when he is sitting still, about 90% of the time his little feet are crossed at the ankles. He stretches his tiny toes out the entire time he does it and wiggles them back and forth in the cutest way.
Ben learned that it's so funny to open his mouth when he's eating.
I wanted Ben to wear the hat for a few extra minutes so that I could take a picture to send to Daddy. He immediately made his boo-boo face. That little bottom lip gets me every time, and the kid knows how to use it!
The boys played peek-a-boo behind my curtains the whole time I worked to make cookies for a friend one day. It was so precious to just watch them enjoy each other as siblings.
This little face will always melt my heart. The rotten crooked-toothed grin. The little hemangioma on his forehead. The droopy eyelid. Some things that may not be considered perfect, but that make my little sweetie the cutie that he is.
Watching my big boy read is one of my favorite things to do. He can get completely engrossed in a book just like his Mommy always does.
My little pirate stealing a cookie while my big pirate was still napping. At first I got upset because we don't let them have much sugar, and these weren't our cookies. And then I saw the joy on his face... A stolen cookie every now and then isn't so bad.
One of my most favorite things to do that I don't allow myself to enjoy enough: baking.
There is something beautiful about flour scattered across the countertop. It's a pain to clean up, but it can be such a wonderful thing.
I had to edit this one a lot so that the rainbow was visible. No, it isn't the brightest rainbow. And it isn't the biggest rainbow. But it's the first rainbow that my big boy ever found on his own without someone's help. I heard, "Mommy! Mommy! LOOK!!!" He's never been so proud.
A recipe turning out like you want it to is something that I don't relish in enough. The failed recipes always overtake my memories.
This kid loves his Daddy. And it's a love that I cannot wait to watch grow even more.
Spaghetti is always such a mess to clean off of this kid. But he loves it so much. And how could you not?! Look at that sweet face...
Almost every day, when I lay him down to sleep, I just stand there and watch him for a minute. The sweet, stillness and the quiet look on his face make me realize that even if I can't give my kids everything, I have given them comfort and safety and support. Enough that they can rest peacefully knowing they'll wake to a happy home.
Cam's new favorite thing to do: Pufferfish face. If you've ever seen Finding Nemo, you'll understand. He yells, " Oh! Here we go!" and puffs out his little cheeks. Then laughs like crazy.
And this one. This is quite possibly my most favorite of the photos I took. It's a mess. I hated cleaning it up. But in the moment that I took this photo, it was because I realized that even when things are tight, even when I get frustrated at a late bill or a less-than-full grocery cart, we have enough. We have more than enough! If I can spend an afternoon making a cake and cookies for friends as they celebrate milestones, then I am so blessed. Not only with the money and the ability to make them something cute and delicious, but also blessed with wonderful people in my life.
If you think my sink is full after thinking about all of the beauty in my life, you should see my heart.
Don't forget to see the beauty in your day. Don't let the busy keep you from it.
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